"Info to understand"
The only way to decipher between abuse and punishment is to be educated in what child abuse is. Both legally and what can be damaging to a child. I do not condone any Abuse, and honestly I think abusive parents are not punished as they should be.ABUSE IS WRONG!If you see or hear of any abuse to a child,baby,spouse,stranger anyone! report it immediately to the authority's
the Californian laws say that what constitutes as abuse is
"Penal Code sections 11165.1 through 11165.6 for definitions.)
Physical injury • Willful harming/endangerment•Mental/emotional suffering • Unlawful corporal punishment/injury•Sexual (abuse, assault, and exploitation) • Death•Severe neglect"
Below there is a chart showing percentage in 2005 of abuse cases and what type of abuse.
If you know of any cases of abuse CONTACT SOMEONE HERE
By:Evan K Williams
When your little bundle of joy first opens its eyes you will see true innocence. When that little bundle Crawls for the first time, you will grab a camera, and when it takes its first steps and says its first word, you will melt. But what do you do, the first time it dose something dangerous, disrespectful, or dishonest? do you let it go? everyone makes mistakes right? why hold it against them? Young children don't have a feel for right and wrong, good and bad, or safe and dangerous. How can you teach a child? Sometimes kind words and suggestive leading is not enough. When you tell your kid no to something dangerous, and they deliberately disobey its time for more assertive actions.But there are appropriate punishments for actions, and appropriate behavior for punishing.
Punishing your child does not make you a bad parent, it's good for the child to learn right from wrong. Punishments don't have to be, AND shouldn't be to severe. These teaching punishments can include, time out (being locked in a room, going to a corner, or sitting on a step for a set amount of time), being sent to bed without dessert, compromise (giving the child what they want within your limits or with conditions), taking an item or privilege away, even spanking (a light pat on the bottom or hand to let a child know not to do something only after you have said "no"). Punishments have always been around and (hopefully) always will be.Young children may cry or be upset when punished, but if a parent is respectful and loving even with the punishments, the child will grow up to be thankful. Therefore, I keep saying to punish with respect, how is that possible?
A child mind is very susceptible to everything around them, so you need to show you still love your child and care for them when you punish them. One way to make sure you don't go over the line is to remember not to jump to a harsh punishment, and NEVER punish out of anger or embarrassment. So know what is a suitable punishment for each action.
Believe it or not your child loves you and looks up to you. If you say "no" assertively, they will usually listen. However, sometimes you may need to point out why you say no before they listen. you should never under any circumstance Shout in anger or insult your child. when you are assertive you may raise your voice level and change your tone only to get there attention and let them know not to continue with there action. Insults will have a long lasting effects on there self esteem, social skills and even emotional comprehension.
-Taking Items or privileges
When a verbal warning dose not work sometimes you have to take action,this is in a way "grounding" your child.For instance if the child is not sharing a toy, you assertively tell them that if they do not share you will take the toy. and if they don't listen you fallow throe and take the toy away. same goes for privileges, this will show the child for one will respect and know you have control, and show that negative actions will result in loss of something they want. This will keep them from continuing in bad/harmful actions.
When you have taken the toy or privilege away and the child is upset, screening, frantic, come up with a compromise. Making a deal with the child such as, "When you learn to share you will get the toy back, or When you stop yelling you can go back outside and play" this will show the child to reason and that if they lesson and are respectful good things will happen.
But when a Child continues in deliberate disobedience, sometimes a small amount of force to show them wen there wrong is needed. DO NOT leave bruises just a small swat on the bottom will get there attention, they will cry even if they aren't hurt, its a reflex. Don't feel bad and don't get angry its only enough force to get there attention. a swat on the butt when they are continuing bad behavior or doing something dangerous. a swat on the but wen they try to run away from you, or walk into the street, or a swat on the hand wen they reach for a knife or a wall socket. they will associate the small amount of pain with that action and learn not to continue that action, this will prevent grater pain or even fatal situations
So punishments dont have to be extreem they just need to be a way to show the child that somthing is dangerous, rood, or bad. dont think your a bad parent when a child crys cause u say no, i know from experience they will thank you later, i know i thanked my parents and they thanked there parents, and i believe my kids will thank me